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Buddhadharma : Winter 2011
BUDDHADHARMA: THE PRACTITIONER’S QUARTERLY WINTER 2 0 11 72 Five I totally vow to refrāin from abusing intoxicants. Sēriously. I mean, abūse this excellent būd? That would just be wrōng. Plus, Dūde, is using it when I need it, abūsing it? Have you ever had super harsh insōmnia? Also my back is whācked, I got a card. I keep it chīll. I don’t ōverdo it. Like when Lūke and me were driving out to Mād River Beach? and he just totally cāshed the bowl, vacuūmed it, did not hand it to me ōnce, and I’m like, Dūde! and he’s like, Whāt? Fīre up another one, he says, and so I pull off of Old Arcāta Road, and as the whēels turn onto the grāvel it’s just freakin’ wēīrd because my favorite sōng is on and it’s rīght at that point, you know where Kūrt says, a mosquīto, my libīdo, the most āwesome part of the most āwesome song, and at that exāct mōment this huge dēēr leaps out right in front of the car and Luke is like, Dūde! You almost kīlled that buck. And right then I was just all līke, I haven’t had one hīt off that bōwl and I’m just feeling how prēcious everything is and this hum, like, my legs, are shāking and these rays of light just, I kid you not, pōūr out of my body, and Lūke’s looking out the front wīndow, and he’s all, This is my mom’s truck, J, watch your drīving, and I’m like, Friēnd, Friend, Friēnd, you know I lōve your mother. And he’s all, I’m sōrry man, and I’m all, No wōrries, and—Wait, wait, wait, what was the quēstion? Six I vow not to slānder, but to gossip mīndfully about juicy tīdbīts. Grānted, haphazard talk is corrōsive, But once in the gāītan, I was standing behind a pērson, —I won’t say his nāme here nōw— and he stepped into the zēndo with the fōōt fārthest awāy from the doorframe, and I raised this with my prāctice leader, and with hīs, complained about it to my rōōmmate, and we both rolled our ēyes as if to say, of cōūrse, and in small group I brought it up without mēntioning his nāme. I was just trying to hēlp his practice, but I would be lȳing if I didn’t say it was also because this gūy really wōrks my nērve. Seven I vow not to praise sēlf at the expense of others. If only other pēople would follow my exāmple on this! Oh this one’s vēry up for me right nōw in my prāctice. I’ve been prācticing with this one a lōt recently. Not praising self at the expense of others. It’s a bīg one, but you know I take it as an opportūnity to really lōōk and see what ’s going on for mē. TALAMADANI